If I could go back and tell my younger self that peace of mind isn’t only found by making money or having a good gym workout, but sometimes just by enjoying the noisy sounds of a busy household, he wouldn’t have believed me. This article is about that life lesson.

In this “Life Playbook” entry, I’m looking back at a recent Saturday afternoon where I let the ordinary sounds of my family living their lives spiral me into a “blah” mood. Something I’ve learned over the years it that there’s a specific kind of silence we often chase that doesn’t actually exist. Try though I might, I sometimes fall into this trap, but when I’m at my best I remind myself that the noise that irritates us is actually the heartbeat of our greatest legacy.

As a ‘driver’ personality, I sometimes equate ‘peace’ as a mindset I can achieve ONLY by checking every box on a to-do list and ending the day with a quiet household. I could just finish my chores early… If I can just get the gym… If I can help everyone get their homework done… If… If… If… THEN I can finally relax.

But my perception of a “perfect” day is often a trap — the very sounds that sometimes irritate us are actually the heartbeat of a life well-lived.

The “Blah” Day

Recently, I had what should have been a great Saturday. I finished my morning chores early and the gym was a great option. Even better my boys were around for some basketball shooting or baseball catch. Or maybe we could have cooked dinner together. But instead of leaning into that abundance, I let a wave of laziness take over and spent the afternoon laying in bed doing Sudoku, watching TV, and spiraling into a late nap. None of which made me feel better.

I was jolted about of my nap by the ‘click clack bang’ sounds of my wife in the next room . She was simply doing her own chores and moving things around in her closet, but in my downward spiraling mood, those ordinary sounds felt like an assault on my peace. The sounds of my boys whooping in the driveway playing ball with their friends, further frayed my nerves. I felt the anxiety rise – followed closely by a heavy blanket of depression because I hadn’t “used” my free time “correctly.”

What did I do? I stayed in my room watching TV and self-medicated with a drink and some mindless snacks. I told myself it would quiet the noise in my head – it didn’t work.

What I missed that day a failure to recognize that “peace” isn’t the absence of noise—it’s the presence of perspective.

The Illusion of the “Quiet Life”

If I could go back and tell myself one thing, it would be this: The “click-clack” of your wife in the other room and the “hooting” of your boys sports aren’t distractions from your life. They ARE your life.

We spend so much of our time “laboring for the wealth of this world,” thinking that financial freedom or a perfectly ordered home will finally bring contentment. We sometimes treat our family’s needs and even their mere presence as hurdles to jump over so we can get to ‘our’ goals. But true riches aren’t found in the silence of a finished to-do list; they are grown in the “memorable moments” that often look like interruptions.

When you feel that irritation rising because the house is “loud” or your plans for a “perfect” productive day have shifted into a “blah” afternoon, remember that you are currently living the days you will one day look back on with a bittersweet ache. The anxiety I felt from those “click-clack” sounds was really just my own internal resistance to the “Tao” or the flow of the moment. I was trying to control the environment rather than being grateful for the people in it.

Don’t Miss the Chance to ‘Reset’ the Day

When you find yourself spiraling into that “off” mood—where you’re too tired to move but too restless to relax—you need a circuit breaker.

On that day, I asked myself later…

• Could going to the gym have ‘reset’ the day?
• Could playing with my kids increased my joy?
• Could helping my wife with her chores, brought me happiness?

The answer is almost always YES – well maybe not doing the chores, but hey nobody is perfect right? Even still, the point is that going to the gym (for example) isn’t about the calories burned, but the fact that movement changes your state of mind. When you move your body, you move the stagnant energy that allows anxiety and depression to take root.

When the “noise” of life gets too loud, the solution isn’t to demand silence. The solution is to change your own frequency. Whether it’s a quick workout, a walk with your spouse, or choosing a “Now Moment” with the kids over a mindless snack and a beer, the fact is that you have the power to course-correct.

That Helpful Dad’s Pocket Guide: The Golden Rules for Household Peace

• The 10-Minute Movement Rule: If you’re feeling “off” or irritable, don’t give up and lie down to wallow. Move for 10 minutes—walk, lift, or stretch. Movement is the best medicine for a “blah” mood.
• Reframe the Noise: Next time you hear the “click-clack” of your family, stop and say a quick prayer of gratitude. That noise means you aren’t alone.
• Audit Your “Self-Medication”: If you’re reaching for a drink or a snack because you’re “sensitive” or “anxious,” you’re just borrowing trouble from tomorrow. Choose a “vibrant life” choice instead – one that brings a smile to your face.
• Prioritize the “Five Good Minutes”: Even on a bad day, you can find five minutes to truly connect with your kids or spouse. These golden minutes can anchor the day in what matters most.

The Legacy Life Call to Action.

Listen, life is fleeting. Don’t waste another afternoon being “too sensitive” to the sounds of the people you love living their lives.

Your Action Step Today: Go to the “noisiest” part of your house—wherever the kids are playing or your spouse is working—and instead of asking them to quiet down, join them for five minutes. Ask about their day, give a hug, or just sit in the “click-clack” and be grateful you’re there to hear it.

In the long run, that’s the only thing that’s going to matter and you’ll be glad you added to the noise!